Chasing my crazy dream in the writing world…

SVS 9: Speechless – YA Contemporary February 9, 2015

Filed under: Blog,contest — chasingthecrazies @ 5:50 am
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Category/Genre: YA Contemporary

Word Count: 70k



My Main Character would prefer to live in: 


All the worst things happen to Lorelei when the weather goes from cold to warm. In fact, it’s been kind of an omen. So she’ll keep to the cold weather, please and thank you. Better cold than dead.






When seventeen-year-old Lorelei Bell steps onto the stage, the entire world vanishes, leaving her, the music, and the boy behind the spotlight. Ever since Lorelei’s freshman theater audition, Erikan has made her heart do more than flutter. He’s been her whole world, even if he hasn’t noticed.


All that changes on the morning of Theaterfest, when the bus carrying her drama troupe careens through a railing and Lorelei risks her life to save those still trapped inside. Escaping seconds before the bus explodes, flying shrapnel slits Lorelei’s throat, severing her vocal chords, life in theater, and any chance she had to speak to Erikan.


Now the so-called “scarred, mute girl,” everything she once was—confident, brave, and strong—has been cut apart. But when she gets a text message from Erikan in the middle of class, she finds there are ways to communicate without words. Armed with texts, notes, and bashful smiles, Lorelei gets more than his attention—she gets his affection.


The relationship blossoms and Lorelei couldn’t be happier, even without her voice. Until her ex-bestie with a bitter grudge hatches a plan to steal the one bright spot in Lorelei’s life: Erikan. As Lorelei senses Erikan being lured away, she realizes she may have to let go of what’s defined her for so long in order to find herself.


SPEECHLESS is Glee meets The Little Mermaid, but instead of talking crabs, fins, and a sea witch, it has theater geeks, tragedy, and a real bitch.



First 250 words:


Breathing. In musical theater, how you breathe changes the quality of tone and length of time a note is held. Singing is all about deep, controlled inhales and slow, careful exhales.


I’ve spent the last four years practicing loads of breathing techniques—everything from pretending to blow up balloons, to chasing feathers around the room, keeping them airborne with every breath. In through the nose, out through the nose. Through a straw. Cyclical breathing. I’ve contorted my face into so many twisted shapes, there were times I was sure my lips might freeze into a perpetual pucker.


But none of these prepared me for what I was about to do. For the first time since we’ve been in drama class together, I was going to talk to Erikan. Like, have a real one-on-one conversation that didn’t revolve around lighting, blocking, or cues.


Breathe, Lorelei. Just breathe. In. Out. I gulped, every muscle in my body tense. Why was I so scared? He was just a guy. They were just words. I could do this. Heck, I’d flirted with guys—even faux made-out with guys—before…onstage.


But this wouldn’t be onstage. There wasn’t a script for what I was about to do. Today, talking to Erikan would be very real.


But it was my senior year. And it was Theaterfest. Today would be a day of no regrets.


A few feet away, Erikan was loading the bus, carefully placing each prop bin inside the trunk like it was a game of Tetris. My heart swelled watching his every movement.


9 Responses to “SVS 9: Speechless – YA Contemporary”

  1. Laura Says:

    Sounds heartbreaking and wonderful, a neat retelling! Please send the first 5 chapters attached in a Word doc, the original query, and subject line with “Sun vs Snow” to

  2. I love the idea of a Little Mermaid retelling. As a heartless ninja I was always kind of an Ursula fan, but I reckon you could change my loyalties. I’d be glad to see the full (plus synopsis) at claire at regal dash literary dot com

  3. Laura Zats Says:

    Nevermind me. Just a ninja in the sun.

    Please send the first 100 pages and a query to laura [at] redsofaliterary [dot] com.


  4. Roseanne Wells Says:

    This sounds hot! Please send a query with 30 pages instead of the usual 20 to and include SUN VS SNOW in the subject line. Thanks!

  5. Sara Megibow Says:

    I can surf! Really I can! hot hot hot

    please send 50 pages to

    please include “SUNVSSNOW” in the subject line

  6. This looks like it could be wonderful. I would like to invite you to send me the full manuscript. furyqueries (at) thebentagency (dot) com

  7. This sounds better than walking down the pier, ice cream cone in hand. Please send the first fifty pages to with sun vs snow in the subject line.

  8. Oo, I love this pitch! Sounds as refreshing as lemonade on a hot day! Please send the first 50 pages, synopsis and query to chquery (at) mcintoshandotis (dot) com. Please put Sun vs. Snow request in the subject line.

  9. Sounds hot as the sun! Please send the 1st 50 pages and query to querymichelle(at)fuseliterary(dot)com. Please put Sun vs. Snow request in the subject line

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